Blog | website

Evan Loftis

Apr 23, 201823 min read

The Many Lies of Ptolemy Vector

“Tell me a lie about San Castelano,” the Viceroy said. The room was windowless, and the walls were constructed out of some oddly...

Evan Loftis

Feb 5, 201841 min read

City of Hermits

“Come, courier, come,” the kindly farmer said, beckoning me into his modest cottage. “Your job is done, and it is cold out.” I had no...

Evan Loftis

Dec 13, 201711 min read

Subjecting "Weekend at Bernie's" to Undeserved Scrutiny

What would you do with $15,000,000? Maybe you would buy a private jet and fly around the world, solving art history-themed mysteries....

Evan Loftis

Oct 27, 201721 min read

Wake Up! With Colonel Crispy

He didn’t want to tell them. They looked so happy, slapping backs and lighting cigars, that he didn’t feel right telling them that the...

Evan Loftis

Oct 21, 20178 min read

BLADE RUNNER 2049 REVIEW (SPOILERS)

When I first heard, a couple years ago, that they were making a sequel to Blade Runner, I was pretty much like, “Okay. Whatever.” Then I...

Evan Loftis

Oct 21, 201715 min read

Behold, The Metatron

It wasn’t an altogether unpleasant sensation, really. More like a gentle massage on the back of his neck, where his brain stem met his...